In the WSJ Magazine over the weekend The Columnist’s topic, in which six luminaries weigh in, was vulnerability. Of all, author Tavis Smiley’s thoughts spoke most to me, “It seems to me that the more vulnerable one is wiling to be, the more courageously one is wiling to act. The person who most opened me to the notion was Maya Angelou. She was willing to make herself vulnerable in her work, her witness and her writing….Everyone is chasing success rather than greatness, and greatness is achieved by loving and serving others. I just don’t think that you can create any kind of masterpiece in life or love if you’re not willing to be vulnerable.”
There are different types of vulnerability. The kind which leaves you feeling unsafe or in peril, especially as a woman, is not what this is about. But it is more about what Tavis discusses, the willingness to be honest and to share one’s imperfections, failures and what scares us. No one’s life is perfect and without struggle as much as our Instagram perfect world would suggest. One of my favorite questions I like to ask women in my interviews is not “What was your biggest success?” but “What was your biggest failure or dud and what did you learn from it?”. Why? Because I’m failing all the time. And I like to hear the introspective and outward looking tools other women use to tackle their own obstacles. If we share our vulnerabilities, I believe we all arrive at a better place. As my younger daughter always says rather jokingly but I write it here in earnest, “The struggle is real.”
photo Irving Penn
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